Waltzing matilda and the sex duck

worldoftanks 2014-10-21 13-51-05-64

So I have been playing a bit of world of tanks with a mate, we are grinding some low level tanks and having a good laugh. The tank in the foreground is some French piece of crap which I am levelling up very much against my principles (it is French after all) because the next one is hilariously small and fast. This one however is glacially slow and I thought it looked like some sort of sex toy, Androx thought it looked like a duck so it was christened the sex duck.. His is a British tank called a matilda, hence the title.

OK back to EVE, siphons are great – I have bookmarked all the siphons in a small radius of where I live and fitted up a nanoed, stabbed hauler to go round and empty them all. This is a great income for new guys, you need almost no skills to dscan down the siphons then warp in, grab the stuff, and leg it quick before the tower starts blapping you (although many have no guns). Do it now – it is actually fun to do, quick and easy and you can feel good about having robbed some valuable stuff from the big guys.

Tuskers are recruiting


Obviously during the alliance tournament there was a stop on recruiting but now the corp is recruiting again. We need capable, easy-going pilots who can fly in small to medium gangs but also create their own content if necessary.

We fly a wide range of ships as appropriate and love fighting outnumbered and outgunned. Our killboard speaks for itself if you are not familiar with us.

For more info start with this forum post. You can also join the in-game channel “The tuskers public channel” and/or come to Prism and shoot at us (we live in Hevrice normally but are on holiday in Prism).

Good luck.

A good day (about 5Bn worth)


Today was pretty good, started off with the aussies over in Ostingele and we went out for an rr punisher roam. These are always bloody hilarious as it’s a semi public roam and so not everyone had done rr before but we did pretty damn well. The highlight of the whole day was one of our first kills – a 2.5Billion PVE fit Barghest. You dont see many of those kicking about, a hurricane had noticed him too and arrived about the same time we did so we blapped him too. The loot fairy was pretty decent to us and we scooped a healthy chunk of ISK.

That roam carried on for a while afterwards and ended up yoloing into another hurricane and some cruisers, we burned down the cane but had arrived slightly scrappily and not together and their kiting caracals got the better of us – it was a bloody good fight though and everyone had a good laugh – those 8M frigs definately don’t owe us anything.

Later on in the day the Tuskers went out in a small VNI gang, three or four plus an exec and a couple of frigs. We roamed for quite a few hours and for the whole roam I was being tortured by the smell of a delicious roasted chicken I had in the oven but which I didn’t have time to eat beforehand. Anyway the roam ended up with us piling into a heavy armour Battleship and cruiser gang. We dropped a Mega, Tempest, Zealot, Fleet cane, three vexors and an Ares for the loss of our four VNIs, at one point I was in low hull and managed to wiggle out of tackle and warp off only to be called back by Sulei to my death:) That was a really damn good fight and if we hadn’t made a few mistakes we would have won, their geddon was also neuting the crap out of us which didn’t help.

Still, a very good day and my conservative sums from the killboard so far are 5Bn killed for Johnny for the loss of about 130M. I’ll take those odds, It’s good being a pirate.

New underwear needed

ExeFile 2014-09-27 20-48-23-22This was a bloody expensive ship too:)

Voice proceedure


VP for short is the art of talking on a radio net (or in our case TS) in a way that:

1. Gets info across clearly and concisely.

2. Prioritises transmission for those who need it and,

3. Minimises he chances of you going bonkers from dozens of people talking at once.

This really is a skill you should learn if you are going to pvp, it can make the difference between winning and loosing but also between enjoying a roam and it driving you nuts. I am a bit of a comms nazi having spent ten years in the British army on very complicated radio nets with different people speaking in different ears and I know how frustrating it can be when people just blurt stuff out without thinking.

The rules on comms are pretty simple really, for a start just treat it as a normal conversation with a friend. You wouldn’t interrupt someone you were talking to face to face so don’t do it here. Rule 1 is listen before you talk, if you spam over the top of someone then neither will be heard and you loose time because both people will have to repeat what they were saying, it’s also rude.

Rule 2 is always speak in the third person, never say “me”, no-one knows who me is and it is wasted transmission time. “Johnny has point, warp Johnny” is quick, accurate and repeats the name to make sure.

Keep it short and don’t waffle when a fight is on. I very much enjoy flying with experienced guys because they know exactly what info needs to be conveyed and do so in a relaxed manner. The rest of the time we are just blethering away like old women but as soon as a fight is on the comms immediately becomes efficient for the duration then it’s back to gossiping.

Learn what needs to be said, blurting out “pilgrim on scan” is pointless, everyone will be monitoring dscan and will see it too, if you can narrow it down to a celestial however then speak up. Telling your fleet that a ship has arrived on grid with you is likewise pointless – your fleet will have seen it.

Voice comms varies greatly depending on the experience level of your fleet, a bunch of newbies will be overexcited and verbose so you will need to quieten them down a bit whereas languid bittervets sometimes forget to call point and just solo whatever they have found. If you find yourself on a new comms server then listen a lot before you speak, try to fit in with their way of doing things and you won’t stick out like a sore thumb.

Hope this helps..

Found on a friend’s bio..

First letter of each named target painter:

Partial Weapon Navigation = pwn
Peripheral Weapon Navigation Diameter = pwnd
Parallel Weapon Navigation Transmitter = pwnt
Phased Weapon Navigation Array Generation Extron = pwnage

Courtesy of Dwaigon Aumer, if this made you smile send him a few ISK.

Shitty crappy internet drama

Well bloody hell, fucking space drama strikes again. A couple of days ago I was happily running a thriving lowsec corp and now I am on the hunt for a new one.

Here is the story (which is idiotic in the extreme) – basically one of the directors had a good old rant at me on the forums and I wasn’t in the mood for nonsensical allegations written in grammar which is worse than that of my eleven year old nephew. This guy had basically been backbiting ever since I became CEO at the wish of everyone except him and I was sick and tired of it to the extent that I wasn’t really undocking much.

I was pretty grumpy at the time and snapped and basically said “well fuck off then, if you want it so much you do it” I made him CEO on the spot and resigned all my roles.

Bit of backstory here, I was super proud when I became a Bastard the first time round and only left when the genius mentioned above took the corp to nullsec and it fell apart, having to be merged into Shadow Cartel to stay alive (thanks mucho for that Bagger, we owe you) I returned about a year ago and with Ana we rebuilt the corp to the thriving community it is today. In a stroke I have probably undone all that work but it came down to a decision that I just couldn’t fly with a guy who constantly undermined everything I said.

Why not just demote the bugger, or boot him you say? Well I could but firstly I don’t think you should abuse authority like that and secondly the backbiting would have intensified massively, resulting eventually in a popularity contest and then probably a corp split, all doing terrible damage to the corp. Far better to be the bigger man, avoid space drama and move on.

I do feel guilty for leaving the guys in the lurch, I’ll miss them like hell and have had so many nice emails and texts that I now wonder whether I did the right thing but what’s done is done and he will never give up the CEO title now he has it. I will always be proud to have been a Bastard but it looks like my future lies elsewhere.

So, where? The answer is that I have no idea really. I have asked Sulei if he will have me back in the Tuskers and asked Bagger if he would have me at Shadow. Both have advantages and disadvantages. I would really like to try out the big shiny stuff at Shadow but my heart is probably more with the small gang Tuskers stuff. I have great memories of taking small 3-5 man gangs out and absolutely murdering everything in sight regardless of size or composition (those guys are good).

I also had the idea in the shower this morning to take a month or so out and just go to highsec, find some poor newbs who had been wardecced, turn them into stone cold killers, and then set them loose on the deccers. Who knows?


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