It’s a good day to be a pirate.

Today has been quite unusually good so far, having lost a pod to a derp when I got back from sailing last week I have been needing some luck. Mr Spaxi has also relieved me of a Comet for winning the monthly “best kill” competition (again) so I’m going to have to enter that this month to save the corp some dough.

Anyway I digress. Anabaric our CEO is getting married soon and doesn’t have the time to spare these days to run our rag-tag band of merry misfits so he retired and I’m the new CEO of the Bastards. While this is pretty cool in itself nothing important will change, we will still be the Bastards as we have been since 2007, no blues, no politics, no bullshit and a tonne of fun.

I spent a little while poking round the alliance interface and didn’t understand a single thing so here’s hoping I don’t mess that up but then spotted a merlin in a plex in Auner. Tally ho, scram bosh and I have his pod pointed so I thought I’d try to get a new haiku for the board.

Johnny Twelvebore > hey
Johnny Twelvebore > gonna need a ransom I’m afraid
Katusha Starski > hi
Katusha Starski > how much?
Johnny Twelvebore > know what a haiku is?
Katusha Starski > yes
Johnny Twelvebore > give me your best shot
Katusha Starski > I say no to terrorists, I’d rather be killed
Johnny Twelvebore > really?
Johnny Twelvebore > rather than be creative and try making a poem?
Katusha Starski > nah, not my native language, so I can’t
Johnny Twelvebore > ah which is your native language?
Johnny Twelvebore > well sorry but no haiku then I’m gonna have to pod you – you seemed like a decent bloke but cant make exceptions


Nothing unusual about this, most people are idiots and would rather loose a pod than compose a poem but I had a premonition and checked my char sheet. Sure enough I had been at -9.999 sec status for months and this one tipped me over to pure -10, Oh yes, good day to be a pirate.



Edit: Today just got better, we jumped through a wormhole to an Amarr lowsec system and scooped over 700M of pos mods (silos, reactors, moon harvesters) which were just laying about. TF would be proud of me.

Pissing off PL (again)


The boys were out on a roam in a variety of t1 frigs the other day when we spotted a flashy Dominix derping about on gate in Evati, it seemed a bit suspicious but hey the number one rule is “always attack bait” so we did.

We tackled it on the gate but just didn’t have enough dps to drop it before it slowboated back to gate and jumped through. We had a guy on the other side but unfortunately it was a regional gate and he decloaked miles off.

Thoroughly interested by now we followed it for a while and next time had a bit more dps and webs so were getting him into low armour when he starts to neut and point and, hey presto, cyno and six PL carriers appear. We laugh and warp off back to amamake which is only a few jumps off and blow up their return cynos.

I can’t remember exactly when it happened but shortly after the cyno went down we hit it a third time just wanting to piss off PL and make them jump about the place for no reason but having several more ships the guy was going down quite well, he is into low armour and still no cyno and I’m doing the sums and decide the carriers can’t lock us before he drops so give the word to all overheat and go balls deep, even if we loose a frig this sod is going down. It all gets a bit exiting as the cyno goes off and again hey presto a pile of carriers jump through with some BLOPS battleships for good measure but they can’t lock us in time and the bait Domi explodes in a glorious vindication of frigate pvp over expensive toy arsewits.

We had a new guy with us and he was a bit slow getting out so they shot up his probe worth about five mill, the Domi came in at 315 mill so we were happy, and if you check the killmail you’ll see his mate even whored on the kill..

Then we went back to amamake again and kept blapping their return cyno so they couldn’t come back:)



Ups and downs


So I have just got back from a few weeks away and as usual I suck, lost an incursus to an atron because I didn’t have a drone and failed to reload null quickly enough. Then I heard that Huola was busy so we went over there and jumped into a gatecamp – I made a series of crap decisions which ended in me loosing my pod and nearly loosing a mates snake pod but thankfully he sucked less than me and got it out. His voice did go a bit squeaky though.

So I went back to Auner (in a noobship, like a boss) and got chatting to Sarcos who was chasing a missioner. I warped in on him in an inty and the whole pocket went for me so I was lucky to get out in one piece, Sarcos went in for him and he had bailed before he got to the second gate.

He did however make one massive mistake by asking in local “did you get the loot?” which told us he had popped the final rat but warped out and couldn’t get back in because of us, then the mission gate despawned. Luckily it was a simple case of scanning his abandoned drones and scooping 300M of loot:)

Bam. Bob giveth and he taketh away (or is that only in wormholes?)

Stand by for a newbie training guide, we have a couple of new guys and they’re asking about training.

Some days you suck, and some days..

Posted Image


Every time I go away I get rusty and this trip was no different, I got back and we have some top new guys in corp so I went out with them, and exploded instantly every time. I think they were a bit downhearted actually having joined a pirate corp and then realised one of the directors was a total dud:)

Today I had some time spare so went out soloing which I don’t do enough, my weapon of choice was a comet and holy crap these things are good!

My spree of awesome started off by whacking a taranis in a tristan, that was a damn close fight and he hung about so I got the pod too.

Then I jumped into the comet of pure evil (btw this is just a standard T2 fit, I don’t do bling or expensive implants) and set off to introduce myself to whoever I could find.

I warped in on a firetail and after a good scrap he dropped and was daft enough to leave his pod hanging about, as I was scooping his loot his mate in a tristan warps in. I was about to bail when I noticed I still had some charges left in my ancil so thought “fuck it” and yoloed into the bugger. Well turns out the shit had dual neuts so I was dry pretty quick but not before Id hurt him, the vamp was sucking a little bit of power back and it came down to the choice between cycle repper or guns. No contest, one burst and he was toast, I was in low hull with the proper pvp shakes – not had that in a while! Scooped the loot and that paid for my ship when it finally pops. Forgot to mention – also got his pod:)


At this point I’m wishing there were more blokes online to hear about this fight when I find a tormentor in a plex. Tally ho etc and got the bugger pointed but he is fast and I’m struggling to close on him to lay the serious hurt on, finally I get close and he eventually goes down but not before his mate in a bloody dual rep incursus turns up! Well it worked once so let’s try again. Its a damn close fight and he reps like a boss but I’m chucking out some serious damage here and just overwhelm his tank as I burn out my repper. Couldn’t have been closer.


The only bad thing about this is that no-one is on to hear about it:)


[edit] Shortly after writing this post I soloed a daredevil in a tristan, today is turning out pretty well:)


Pissing off PL..



EVE is a game and I think often that fact is forgotten. We play the game to have fun and we laugh loud and often on comms which is basically my metric of success, if we come back with holds full of loot and sides sore from cracking up laughing then I count it as a good roam.

So when Tibbs insisted on ventures the other day I groaned out loud but then hopped into my trusty venture which has been alive for a worryingly long time now.

We scanned out a firetail and blapped him (plus the pod) then found a PL bait drake sat on gate. Now everyone knows this is a brick tank with a cyno but we were a bit drunk and thought it would be a laugh to shoot it up and try to provoke a reaction. So we did and our five battle ventures piled into it on the gate, he agressed back and we set about maximising our dps to see what we could do. At about 1/3 shield the inevitable cyno goes up and there is much cheering on comms as the overview goes red with BLOPS battleships and carriers – we didnt hang about and got off grid laughing our guts out. They must have lit a return cyno because they dissapeared quickly but the cyno was still up so we warped back in and continued pelting it.

A bit more organisation at this point would have got us the kill but we were a bit slow and they jumped more big stuff through the gate to chase us off and the drake finished its cyno and jumped out.

Ah well never mind, we jumped into Amamake and found their return cyno and thought “why not” so five ventures warped onto station where the BLOPS and carriers were sitting, blapped the cyno talwar and warped off before they could lock us, Mr Spaxi had the pod locked but had to leg it when they finally got him targetted.

This must have riled them up as a massive command ship fleet then chased us about for a bit but obviously couldnt catch frigates and it was only when they finally got firetails that we thought it was time to bog off and executed the “brave sir robin” manouvre as quickly as we could.

Not much in the way of kills that night but we had a right good laugh poking PL.

Mobile what?



Found this by accident when I was in settings, anyone any idea what it is?

Woohoo – top 2000



Well I have made it into the top 2000, pretty happy with that and I think I have found my level so not going to stress it if I waver up and down from here. I havent made any special effort to maximise points beyond flying cheap and (obviously) exploding as many ships as possible so lets just see what happens.

On a seperate note our elite Bastards web monkeys are working on a killboard with “true” efficiency on it i.e. the value of ships lost against the value of mods dropped from enemy ships so watch this space – it should be cool.


New Mordu ships

ImageThe new Mordu ships look great and I couldn’t care less about the back story but since I am writing this just before Kronos goes live here is my prediction on how they will be used:

You know that time you got caught by a linked Keres and it orbited you at 40km doing some ridiculous speed and slowly picked you to death? Well these are going to do the same thing except they will kill you a lot faster. At least to start with the Mordu’s Legion ships will be very expensive (let’s see how common the lowsec belt bpc drops are) so the increasingly risk and lossmail averse meta that seems to prevail these days will ensure that these ships wil be flown with faction points and links. I for one will be avoiding the bloody things like the plague.

Where they will shine is kiting the crap out of inexperienced players, a couple of these or even one for point plus some long range dps would really make a mess of brave newbies for instance (although they don’t give a crap and will eventually get you). High sec shenanigans may also benefit from this ships combo of long point and damage application.

Expect to see Shirak skunkworks and Imperial fedaykin flying these round lowsec soon:)

Who honours ransoms?

ImageWe ransomed a guy in a missioning drake earlier today for the budget price of 35M and he was seriously grumpy about it (next time I’ll just blast the bugger) but it got me thinking about ransoms again.

This post is therefore going to be a simple list of corps I know of who will definitely honour ransoms (and 1v1s too). I am going to link to reddit and encourage anyone whose corp has a policy of keeping their word to comment so I can update this post. Perhaps it will go some small way to making ransoms a “thing” again.

Any corp listed below has a 100% policy of honouring ransoms and 1v1s and would guarantee this at CEO level. If you are offered a ransom by anyone in these corps and you pay up, they will let you go.

So without further ado I can add my own corp The Bastards and a corp I have spent much time in, The Tuskers. There are several more who I suspect would have a similar policy but I won’t jump the gun until they get in touch. Comment below if you are happy to add your corp to this list and I’ll update the post.

The Tuskers

The Bastards

Shadow Cartel (alliance)

Black rebel rifter club (and alliance)



ISK. The first question I get asked when new guys come to lowsec is “how can I make ISK?” to which of course the correct answer is “explode ships and take their loot” but unfortunately getting to the stage where you can do this takes a bit of time and no small number of your own ships going boom.

We wrack our brains and suggest stuff like exploration but really that’s only worthwhile if you go to null and for that you need a covops and archaeology 5 etc plus a bit of practice on how to avoid bubbles and camps. Station trading also comes up but everyone I know who has tried it has definitely made money but also given up before too long because BLOODY HELL IT’S BORING. PI comes up and it can produce some basic returns mostly afk but again unless you really skill into it and keep the chains going then it is not much.

The truth is that in this game you will eventually fall into ways of making money, what I find boring you may find palatable but it takes time and a few skills to be trained up. I have tried pretty much every way of making ISK in this game and to be honest have yet to find a better one than blowing people up and taking their stuff – I don’t make much but it is enough to keep me in small fast ships and my alt does a few beary things on the side to make sure I have some space savings.

Very recently (and especially with PLEX at an all time high) I have concluded that for the new guys who have less in game skills, buying a PLEX is the best way to get started. Most people will earn the £15 you need very quickly in their real job and certainly many times faster than you could make 700M ISK with a low SP character in game. Further along the line you will be able to do DED plexes, relic sites, incursions or how ever else you want to make money but to start out just pony up the cash and be free of worries for a good few months while you learn.


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